Chapter 15

Take fifteen bites.
“Please, I’m begging you. This is really important to me. Can you help me?”
“I swear, I’m only skipping once. Just pretend you didn’t see it, okay?”
“I’ll be back soon.”
…
The girl lowered her head and softened her brows, hands rubbing together as she clasped them in a pleading gesture.
She was the one lying first, yet it was impossible to get angry at her.
She even said it righteously:
“Chaoli-ge finally came back for once. I’m just going to go see him. Just one look and I’ll come right back.”
She said it as if it were the most natural thing in the world.
Her brows and eyes were gentle, and the dimples at the corners of her lips held a thin, coaxing smile that made it impossible to refuse her.
He Mingye lowered his eyes, looking at the girl pleading so hard in front of him.
Thick, long lashes like crow feathers hid the faintly mocking smile in his gaze.
How could he refuse her?
He Mingye could never refuse Ying Tao’s requests.
He lifted his eyes as if nothing happened, and as always, raised a hand to rub the top of her soft hair. A lazy smile hooked at the corner of his mouth.
“You want to go see him? Sure.”
“Trade your own labor for it. One month of breakfast.”
“If tomorrow I don’t see you deliver it on time, then I can’t guarantee Uncle Ying won’t find out about your pretending-to-be-sick and skipping class.”
Ying Tao protested, unhappy. “You’re too ruthless. You’re scamming me out of a whole month of breakfast.”
“What?” He Mingye raised a brow. “Not willing?”
“If you’re not willing, I’ll call your dad right now—”
“Fine!” Ying Tao frowned and cut him off quickly. “I’ll do it.”
“Here—pinky promise. You’re not allowed to tell my dad, and you’re not allowed to tell Aunt He.”
“Deal.”
She hooked his pinky, then stamped it like sealing a contract.
…
She always had a reason.
And she always had a way to seize his soft spot.
Maybe after all these years, he still hadn’t learned how to refuse her.
When she crept close without a sound, just like before—hooking a finger, speaking softly to please him, gently and sweetly asking to make up—
He couldn’t harden his heart against her again.
Just like that summer.
The girl had run toward the person she loved without hesitation, while he stayed rooted in place, without even a reason to stop her.
He only watched coldly as that figure grew farther and farther away—
Like a butterfly, light and delighted, fluttering through a field of blossoms.
In the end, she spread her beautiful wings, trembling, and flew toward the distance.
She didn’t notice.
And she wouldn’t care.
How miserable the person behind her was.
…
When He Mingye came out after paying, what he saw was Ying Tao and Chen Zijian—both tipsy—standing by the roadside, talking with great seriousness.
“Don’t be fooled by how proper this kid looks now,” Chen Zijian said. “He just loves acting cool.”
“Right!” Ying Tao finally found an ally. “He’s always been like this. Back when he was at the affiliated high school, he loved acting cool and flirting around. And somehow tons of girls liked him. No discipline at all.”
Chen Zijian asked with interest, “Tons of girls liked him? Then what about you? Did you like him too?”
“I don’t like him.” Ying Tao pouted. “I hate him the most. He always bullies me.”
Chen Zijian lifted a brow. “He’s that annoying?”
“Mm!”
Ying Tao nodded hard—
Only she was swaying so badly she couldn’t stand steady. Her body tipped backward, almost falling.
Behind her, it was like there was a wall.
Something braced her leaning weight.
Her arms were thin. She had barely any flesh on her.
He Mingye held her by the arm and drew her into his chest.
Chen Zijian sighed. “How did she turn like this from just a bit of plum wine?”
The owner of the private restaurant was his friend. Knowing Chen Zijian was eating there, he’d even brought out some home-brewed plum wine for him to taste.
Fruit wine usually wasn’t that strong—just easier to drink than hard liquor. It shouldn’t have gotten her this drunk.
“She can’t handle alcohol.”
Ying Tao’s tolerance was terrible. She just didn’t know it.
Plum wine was sweet and tart, very appetizing—perfect for her, since her tooth pain lately had ruined her appetite.
So she’d secretly poured herself cup after cup.
By the time she realized it, she’d already drunk nearly half a jar by herself.
Chen Zijian sighed. “If I’d known, I wouldn’t have accepted that jar of plum wine.”
“You—hurry up and take her back.”
“Make her some hangover tea. Otherwise she’ll wake up with a headache tomorrow.”
He Mingye glanced at the girl who was already nearly asleep and gave a flat “Mm.”
…
When she was drunk, she spent most of the time sleeping.
She rarely did what other people did—getting loud, making a scene, going crazy off the drink.
There was only one time.
Only that one time.
In her senior year of high school, she’d gone through too many unpleasant things. On top of the pressure of exam prep, she’d abandoned the path her parents had arranged for her all along and chosen a different road—harder, tougher.
At last, she graduated.
And she got into Nanyi smoothly.
A few close friends celebrated her graduation with her, and also celebrated the eighteen years that were about to arrive—her coming-of-age.
The party was loud and lively.
Zhou Lubai even sent him a video.
In the video, she held a microphone quietly and sang. Light swept across the girl’s delicate brows and eyes—so beautiful it didn’t seem real.
Zhou Lubai said:
“To be honest, every time I see Little Taozi now, I feel like some ancient sinner. The guilt is so heavy.”
“A while ago, didn’t I go with her to the arts entrance exam?”
“She was so nervous—couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep. I thought I should help her relieve some pressure, so I took her to my little uncle’s school on the way.”
“I figured maybe if she saw my little uncle, she’d feel a bit lighter.”
“But we waited at the gate for ages. I saw with my own eyes a girl linking arms with my little uncle as they walked out, all close and intimate.”
“I even went to ask around about who the girl was. They said she’s my little uncle’s direct senior—she’d been chasing him for a long time.”
“But from the looks of it, she probably succeeded. They’d already started dating.”
Zhou Lubai complained:
“You have no idea how panicked I was. I wanted to find a hole and bury myself.”
“These past days, I’ve been suffering like hell. I was thinking—if Little Taozi really gets affected by this and tanks the exam, wouldn’t I have to die to atone?”
“Thankfully,” Zhou Lubai said, beyond relieved, “Little Taozi was tough. She passed smoothly.”
“Otherwise I’d have no face to explain to Old Ying.”
What happened with Zhou Chaoli didn’t really have anything to do with him.
But his surname was Zhou too. Even if they were only uncle and nephew and not close day to day, it had been his rotten idea to take her to Zhou Chaoli’s school.
If Ying Tao really got affected and didn’t do well, how could he still show his face around those siblings?
If Ying Baiqing—the ultimate sister-con—found out, Zhou Lubai would get skinned alive.
He Mingye listened quietly.
His gaze slid past Zhou Lubai and landed on the person sitting alone in the corner behind him.
She was very quiet. Her eyes stayed on the screen, never leaving. Slim fingers gripped the microphone.
Her voice was clean—yet there was a faint, hard-to-detect bitterness hidden inside.
“I miss you so much, I miss you so much,
yet I lie to myself.
I miss you so much, I miss you so much,
yet I keep it as a secret.”①
When she cried, there was no sound.
So no one noticed how sad she was.
That night, the girl didn’t know.
She carried it behind everyone’s backs and secretly made a phone call to pour it all out.
She hid in a corner no one would notice.
At first, she only whispered about missing someone.
Maybe because that longing was too bitter—so bitter even she, who loved sweetness, couldn’t bear it—and she began to cry as she spoke.
She suppressed her sobs, sniffling softly.
“Why didn’t you come?”
“Do you really hate me that much?”
He Mingye stood on a midwinter street.
Frost and snow covered the ground. The biting cold drilled into bone.
He thought: Boston’s winter wasn’t that different from Jingbei.
Frozen earth, snow everywhere, lonely pedestrians—equally cold, equally empty.
At first, when he decided to study abroad, his parents didn’t agree.
Before leaving, he’d nearly fallen out with his father. His father cut off all his money and declared again and again:
“If you want to go, I won’t stop you.”
“But think clearly. The moment you walk out of here today, don’t even think about coming back.”
“I’ll pretend I never had a son.”
“Since it’s the road you chose, you go make your own way.”
“I won’t give you a single cent.”
“How you survive abroad—that’s your business.”
He found an apartment near Kenmore, sharing with a roommate named Lisvic—a Croatian.
Lisvic formed an underground band and invited He Mingye to join.
So He Mingye went to class in the daytime.
At night, when he had time, he performed with the band in underground bars.
On holidays, he’d sometimes take shifts at a nearby Chinese restaurant.
The night before he flew back, Lisvic specifically came to drink with him as a send-off.
When they paid, Lisvic noticed the photo in his wallet and raised a brow.
“Jon, is that your girlfriend?”
He Mingye put his wallet away. “No.”
“Not?” Lisvic looked amused. “You treasure that photo so much. I figured it must be someone important to you.”
“I thought it was the girl you like.”
“Aren’t you going back to celebrate her birthday?”
Lisvic nudged his shoulder, teasing. “I saw it.”
“That necklace you packed in your suitcase.”
“Last time, after our performance, when we left Quincy, I saw you staring at a necklace in a shop window for a long time.”
“These past two days I went back to look, and it was gone.”
“You’re giving it to her, right?”
“Your muse.”
He Mingye didn’t deny it.
Lisvic raised his glass. “Then I wish you a smooth trip.”
“May you win your muse’s favor soon.”
He had been in a rush to return and couldn’t get a direct flight.
He left from Logan Airport, transferred in Chicago, then switched flights in Los Angeles to Hong Kong, and only then returned to Jingbei from Hong Kong.
By the time he landed, it was close to midnight.
After a long, exhausting journey, he finally stood on a Jingbei street again.
Snow fell silently, piling onto his shoulders.
The poor girl was probably drunk—
So drunk she didn’t even realize what a huge mistake she’d made.
So drunk she couldn’t even tell that the number she’d dialed wasn’t the person she’d been longing for.
She only cried in a small voice, complaining with hurt and grievance.
“How could you not come?”
“How could you not come?”
“I waited for you for so long… I…”
Her words grew slurred.
Maybe the alcohol had risen.
Maybe she was simply too tired from crying.
Her voice got smaller and smaller, more and more blurred.
She hiccuped softly.
Her voice, barely there, confessed her longing as if it were the most natural thing.
She said, “I miss you so much… I really miss you.”